Take Your Child To Work Day

The house is empty today because "Wife" took "Daughter" to work with her. No, "Daughter" was not kicked out of school for emitting noxious odors or threatening to shoot her classmates, it's National "Take Your Child To Work Day." Some of you may remember when this was just "Take Your Daughter To Work Day."

That was a quaint concept. Let the little girls go to work with mommy and see what it's like to fetch coffee for the boss then have to sit on his lap while taking dictation, all the while hoping that he doesn't grab your ass again when you're getting some documents from the bottom drawer of the file cabinet. I've never worked in an office, so I'm not sure that ever happened, but in my mind, that's how all offices run. Did I mention that my secretary is also wearing a short plaid skirt and librarian glasses? Oh, sorry I allowed my mind to wander and look where it took me. Back to the point. Girls would go to work with their moms to see what it was like to be in the business world. That may have been a good idea in 1965, when a lot of moms stayed home, but now, just about all the moms I know work. Kids know all about work even though they try to avoid it at all costs.

A few years ago, someone must have thrown a hissy because they didn't have a daughter and wanted to slack off for a day like their girl bredding co-workers. The day was changed and now little boys can go to work too. Now it's men and women bringing their sons and daughters to work and nothing is getting done. That's not a good representation of the workplace. Why not just video tape an average day at the office, complete with stress, gossip, back stabbing and unrealistic deadlines. Then you can play it for your kids. If that doesn't make them work harder in school so that they can someday be their own boss, nothing will.

I'm not sure I would want my kid to see where I worked. Granted, I have a weird job. I don't think "Daughter" needs to see me in some smoky bar verbally jousting with an inbred drunk. Let her keep her romantic notion that I'm a cool star for awhile. Even if I was in an office I'd leave her home. You are a hero to your kid. Do you really want them to see you taking orders from the boss that you call inept every night at the dinner table. Seeing their parent jammed into a little cubicle is not cool, no matter how may troll dolls you have on the ledge. I'm hoping a rumble doesn't break out between the boss' kids and the support staff kids. It would be like "West Side Story" with staplers.

To be honest, if I had to exist in the 9 to 5 world, I'd be looking for any excuse for a break too. I know "Wife" and "Daughter" are going out to lunch and there are a lot of things scheduled for the kids. It should be fun for "Daughter", and maybe she'll see how hard "Wife" works and be a little more grateful. I doubt it. Let's hope she grabs all the office supplies I told her to. I can use some more paper clips. Later....Brian