Ear Plugs Sold Seperately

OMG! That was undoubtedly the most popular text message being sent by thousands of Chicago area "tweens" last night after witnessing the most popular thing to come along in music since the advent of the ear.

On a blustery, frigid night, the pink tour bus of Hannah Montana (no relation to Tony Montana of Scarface fame, even though they both said hello to their little friends) aka Miley Cyrus pulled into town and brought with it one of the highest grossing concert tours of the year. Tickets had sold out in minutes, but "Wife" and "Daughter" were there. The first response I got after telling some friends about my ladies (yeah, I'm Mr. 1973) heading to the show was "How the hell did you swing those tickets?" I was shocked by the tone of envy in their voices. Maybe the envy was tinged with greed, knowing that a pair of tickets to see the pre-packaged Disney musical creation could fetch thousands of dollars on the open market. That makes more sense.

I didn't have anything to do with securing the tickets. "Wife" in her infinite wisdom joined the Miley fan club, "Miley World". One of the perks of the $30 membership was that a "limited quantity" of the modern day equivalent of Willy Wonka's golden tickets would be offered to the faithful the day before the rest of the screaming masses could vie for them. At the appointed time, "Wife" went into a "refresh" button pressing frenzy which culminated in a pair of tickets in the upper atmosphere of the venue. I was informed that these precious dockets would be our Christmas gift to "Daughter", ensuring "Wife" the title of coolest mom ever.

So last night, off they went. "Daughter" had been saving money from Christmas gifts, and other gestures of generosity so that she could continue to fill the coffers of the Disney Corporation and a teenage millionaire. Normally, I try to instill some sort of fiscal responsibility into her little noggin', but last night I knew she would spend like a drunken sailor. (No offense to all the drunken sailors who are known to frequent this forum, but you know it's true, you spend like crazy after a few highballs.) "Wife" did apply some bakes to the consumer train and "Daughter" came home with the requisite concert T (priced 300% higher than my first concert T. It was the Eagles by the way.), some fake all access laminents and a $10 glow stick that "Wife" said was the must have for every girl in the place.

The revues were glowing. "It was awesome! It was better than I ever expected." was how "Daughter" phrased it. "Wife" just smiled and said loudly ( the two and a half hours of constant shrieking, not her own, had left her ears a bit tingly) "that kid puts on a really good show." According to my sources, there were backup dancers, pyrotechnics and video screens. The music was good and the hot topic of a body double was not an issue, since Hannah/Miley let her opening act sing while she transformed. "Wife" said that right before the change, Hanna and her opening act launched into a spirited rendition of the KISS classic Rock and Roll All Night. Who knew that these kids partied every day? Not the kids in the audience. "Wife" reported that thousands of little faces suddenly went slack, but the parents took the opportunity to bob their heads and shake their tail feathers.

So "Daughter's" first concert is in the books. It was a real bonding experience for both "Wife" and "Daughter" and I'm glad they were able to share it. I'm also glad I didn't have to. I don't care how loudly Hannah, Aly and AJ sing it, I doubt they really rock and roll all night. Later...Brian