I've Got to Keep My Butt Off The Copier

Today is the WGN "Holiday Luncheon". This being my second year attending the truncated festivities, I'm not quite as nervous as I was last year. A few more people know me, so I won't appear to be some random giant ravaging the buffet line. I also haven't been wavering in my decision to attend as I did in the past. I figure it's always good to be seen by the bosses, and who wants to pass on a free lunch?

I have been reading numerous articles about the perils and traps that await employees at there holiday gatherings. According to various polls, more than 40% of employees know of someone who has been reprimanded or terminated (not by a cyborg, but by an automaton in H.R.) after getting a little carried away at the office party. Wild tales of drinking, "heart to heart" talks with the boss and carnal indiscretions abound. Those all sound like my stock in trade, and that has me worried. Thankfully, if this year is like last, the alcohol will be in short supply. The "party" is at the station, and the chance of someone having a wee bit too much holiday cheer and then broadcasting to half the country their thoughts on an account execs tight hind quarters is too risky to allow the Jaegermiester shots to flow freely. This is probably a very good move. While I rarely drink to excess (any more), free booze and her siren's song are sometimes too strong to refuse. I have also been known to wax philosophical after a few adult beverages, and I'm sure no one wants to hear my treatise on the future of radio, especially when shouted at them from close range.

I'll go, make an appearance and be on my best behavior. I suggest you do the same if you're off to your own company party. Remember, no matter how much you think the 21 year old receptionist has been eying you all year, grabbing a little bit of booty on Friday night will not seem like such a good idea on Monday morning. I'm off to iron and make myself pretty. Later...Brian