Hey, Remember Me?

Howdy stranger. It's been a long time. So much has happened since last we visited. I've neglected Valentine's Day, the Northern Illinois tragedy, a crazed house frau slamming into my car and even Groundhog's Day. I'm back just in time to wonder about the woman whose ass became fused to a toilet seat because she hadn't left her bathroom in two years. I've had some lengthy dealings on the throne, but usually once my legs fall asleep I call for help. Apparently she had some mental dysfunction (really?) that made her feel safe in the can. I too sometimes seek solace in the W.C., but again, once I've perused the current issue of Entertainment Weekly I call it a day and go to another room in the house. I don't care how nicely appointed your bathroom is, I can't imagine wanting to spend two years in there. Hers was not a high line, four star poopatorium either. She's a fine, trailer living nut case. Have you ever had to use the bathroom in a trailer? I'm not proud to say I have, and trust me when I tell you, five minutes in one of those aluminum cells is four and a half minutes too long. Anyway, the authorities finally got her, toilet seat and all, to the hospital where she's now undergoing a very painful and personal separation. I got stuck to a vinyl car seat one summer, and I know how much getting out of that Gremlin hurt. I can't imagine having a plastic Peerless seat scraped from my delicate hind quarters.

By now you're probably thinking,"Hey Brian, you're back, but why the absence?" No excuses. I'll thumb nail it for you. Almost three weeks of working the overnight shift filling in for the great Steve and Johnnie, doing my own shows, so much inter-family illness that a "Quarantine" sign should have been plastered to our door, a serious health scare with our oldest dog (things seem ok now) and a general sense of too much going on. See, nothing more than any of you are going through, but it makes composing witty missives seem less important. Take heart in knowing that I have been harassed by a number of people for not being more diligent. Peer pressure being what it is, I'll try harder. ( I know, you've read that before.)

Here's the part where I shamelessly plug stuff. Don't forget to listen to the big show on WGN Saturday night/Sunday Morning. I'll have lots of Irish music, and Irish trivia during the "Overnight Arcade" all to celebrate St. Patrick's Day. There are sure to be more surprises. Another thing. You know how I like to embrace technology, well I've joined Facebook. One of my fine listeners has started the "Brian Noonan WGN Overnight Fan Club". I know, I'm as shocked as you are, but flattered none the less. If you're a Facebook member, drop by and join the group. Total world domination is the goal. Have a great weekend! Later...brian