I Need Me Some Book Learnin'

I was reading a study today that listed the top paying majors for college students entering the work force. I have been on the periphery of the work force for some time, but I hold out great hope for "Daughter" so I actually tried to digest some of the information.

The top three highest paid majors are.... Chemical engineers who start at $55,900, electrical engineers at $52,899 and mechanical engineers at $50,046. It doesn't take an engineer to see the pattern. On the flip side, the lowest paid majors are Liberal Arts and Social Studies majors who star out at about $31,000. I have what could be considered a Liberal Arts degree. Most of my friends who got the same degree are doing very well, but I guess average is average. Nowhere on that list is stand-up comic. I realize that there is no major for that, but considering how I lived in college, I should have an advanced degree. Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if I had put down the beer bong and picked up a protractor.

"Nerds " have taken control of the earth. Computers were just coming on the scene when I was in college. There was no such thing as a laptop. (I'm not that old, it was only 20 years ago.) Now technology and the people who create it are as much a part of our lives as breathing. Nerds have made it possible for you to be reading my mindless ramblings. I hope "Daughter" is a nerd. Not the broken glasses and pocket protector kind of nerd, but the smart, funny, socially adept kind of nerd.

She is very smart, and sometimes seems embarrassed by that fact. I think that is common with little girls. They want to be popular and if you stand out too much for being a brainiac, people look at you funny. "Wife" and I always tell her that being smart is a great thing, and that it is possible to be a "Cool Nerd." We also tell her that the people who look at her funny for being smart are mongoloids and that she'll be able to hire them to clean her toilets when she's older. We don't mess around when it comes to putting down the intellectually challenged. It seems like she has a good start. She has no desire to follow in my footsteps and hit the road peddling yuks to the drunken masses. She says she wants to be a Marine Biologist. Fine, but get an engineering degree too!

I'm off to Peoria, the "Jewel of the Midwest." If you're in the area, I'll see you at the Jukebox Comedy club. Later....Brian