Happy Halloween

Today marks the annual running of the juvenile beggars, better known as Halloween. This afternoon, countless youths dressed in all manner of costume will descend on my porch and expect me to give them candy just because they asked for it. What a scam. I'd love to just ask random folks for a Zagnut and have them comply, but I don't see that happening. I'll play along because the prospect of scraping egg, soap and excrement off my house far outweighs the cost of a few bags of candy. My only rule is that the Oliver Twist rejects have to cough up an actual "trick or treat". Last year I had a stare down with a group of under costumed hooligans that lasted about 17 minutes because they wouldn't say the magic words. It's bad enough that high school kids put on a hoody and think that "disenfranchised youth " is a good Halloween get up, but having them stare at me mutely while holding out a dingy pillow case is over the line.

Someone suggested that I have the children actually perform a "trick" before giving them a treat. While the prospect of having a mini Spiderman or ballerina jump through a flaming hoop, or recite the Gettysburg address while downing a frozen Snickers fills my befuddled mind with glee, the company I would be sharing my inevitable jail cell with puts me off my plan. I'm making the more squeamish kids pay a high price anyway. I've created a pretty scary gauntlet that they need to run to get their sugar filled bounty. I temper it for the very young since the prospect of scaring a toddler so bad that they leave me a little treat doesn't seem sporting.

Tonight should be fun. There's still enough of a kid in me to remember how much fun Halloween was, so I do get a kick out of watching the kids come by. Do me a favor though. If you have a kid going trick or treating tonight, remind them to say "thank you." Free candy deserves that much.

It's been a wild week. I've spent the last two mornings filling in for Steve and Johnnie, which is always a blast. I'll be back on the air for two big WGN Overnight shows this weekend. Tonight/ Saturday morning from 2-5 (That's right, I'm back and will be hosting the show on a regular basis) and Sat. night/Sunday morning from 1-5. Lucky you, because of the end of Daylight Saving Time, you get an extra hour of me Sunday morning. You'll probably be wired from eating all your kid's "dangerous" candy so you'll be awake to listen. I'm off to bed, visions of goblins dancing in my head. Happy Halloween. Have a great weekend! Later...Brian