She's Toxic

You've heard the old saying "you need a license to drive a car, but any idiot can have a baby." Proof of that is all around us. Take a trip to Wal-Mart any weekend and you'll be bombarded with the evidence. Sure, you may think that bad parenting is exclusive to trailer living, mullet wearing, book spurning folks, but it extends to the highest level of entertainment too.

Britney Spears is in the news again today for yet another glaring example of why hillbillies, even rich ones, shouldn't be allowed to reproduce. You may recall that twice in the past couple of months, our Miss Spears has been the focus of the DCFS. First there was the picture of her driving with her newborn son on her lap. Then came the mysterious "fall" out of the high chair that prompted another visit from the man. Now, a picture was released of her driving with the baby again. This time she did put the baby in a car seat, but it was facing the wrong way and from the way the baby's body was leaning, authorities are saying that the seat belts were not tightened correctly.

Britney's people are firing back that California doesn't have a law requiring that car seats face backwards, only ten states do and that since the baby weighs over 20 pounds she's not breaking any laws. It would be nice if these same people spent less time spinning stories and more time helping Brit buckle the kid up. There's also no law against sugar, but I don't feed "Daughter" a diet of Pixie sticks. There are some things it's ok to make excuses about, not doing everything you can to keep you child safe isn't one of them.

I kind of feel bad for Britney. She was forced to grow up fast and turned into a sexual object at a young age. Now she's tired and wants to get back to her roots. You can take the girl out of the trailer park, but you can't take the trailer park out of the girl. If it was just her, that would be fine. Let her eat Cheetos and walk barefoot in gas station bathrooms. If she wants to hook up with some loser back up dancer who's already fathered kids with another woman, go for it. She really wants a "normal" life, but it's never gonna come. You can't be regular folk when your "old man" can't pull up his pants and keeps impregnating you to hang onto his meal ticket. Have your people send this guy to the drug store. There's a whole aisle of condoms. This genetic line must be cut.

I think some people are just too self absorbed to have kids. Young celebrities are so used to getting their asses kissed that they have no idea what kind of responsibility a child is. There are some exceptions, but Britney isn't one of them. It seems like the kid is just another accessory for her trashy life.

I hate coming down on Mrs. K-Fed so hard. I like to remember her as the fresh faced Lolita, driving men crazy in her school girl outfit, or the simmering dominatrix from her "Onyx Hotel" tour. (Why do I know that?) Now she reminds me of an over the hill stripper or one of those backwoods lottery winners. She's got the cash, but lacks the class. The good news is there's another baby on the way, so the fun has just begun. Buckle up. Later...Brian